Friday, September 23, 2005

teenage dirtbag baby

today i got an email from dave. this is what it said:

"I am out soon mofo. Shaun pcs's in feb and he should be back at the endof the month. I will chat with you when I get back. Later dave"

dave is the latest casualty in short-of-notice, all-expense-paid vacations to an undisclosed location for an undisclosed amount of time. that's a bummer - he just got back from 2 months in the uk. i haven't had a chance to visit him since july. i guess i'll have to drink all weekend long in the local area instead of going down the road to drink all weekend long. seriously, i talk a big game like it's only about partying, but i sincerely hope he's not going anywhere too dangerous...

okay, enough about that sad shit. i'm getting ready right now to go out with hanky-poo and trophy wife to the irish pub in the nearest big town, which is in the netherlands, thank fucking god. i don't know if i could deal with the german mentality after this excessively long week of one perpetual hangover after another. no....thanks.

let me re-phrase. i should be getting ready right now. i just woke up from my afternoon nap and i will probably sit on the computer (well, not literally folks) until half past eight, which is when i need to be leaving the house. hindsight being 2o/20, i really only have negative 30 minutes to get ready as opposed to an hour and fifteen. smile, i'm a procrastinator.

i also had this afternoon off -- took off at 12 o'clock sharp; i'm an over-achiever, what can i say? i raced home, literally (i swear to fucking god, every slow driver this side of checkpoint charlie made it their mission to fucking cut me off), changed, and headed for the dutch equivalent of a mall. hunted down H&M, spent $130 smackers in record timing, and then it was back to V&D where another $70 was thrown down. for what you ask (actually, ya'all probably don't care, but i'm gonna say anyway because i'm super excited):

my oktoberfest outfit for tomorrow. i haven't dressed up in weeks! so, i bought this heavy velvet blazer, a full plaid skirt, this gorgeous corseted hook-down excessively low cut shirt, suede purse, and costume pearls (ya know, for that whole innocent edge?); also, i didn't have to splurge on a new pair of shoes -- i have a pair of vintage pumps in antique black. i will look daaaaaaahling, daaaaaaahling. can't wait!

these are all the recruits i've enlisted -- tom, laura, preston, andy (i didn't really recruit him, but i'm sure he'll be with the prior), melissa and naked joe, and midgetti, whom i still haven't called. see, zeph, all that trouble for his number and i don't fucking call. i'm an asshole.

last, but not least, i'm going on a drunk dialing-IM-spree tonight as well as tomorrow. bitches beware. i'll be out with a vengeance, drunk, and talking like a female version of boomhauer from king of the hill. sorry, ya'all - some things just can't be helped. aaaaaaaaah, it's so good to party after 3 weeks without any fun!!!!!! yay for me.

anyway, 8 minutes have since transpired when i began this post, well, 8 minutes ago. i'm listening to wheetus right now....oh, yeah, dirtbag....!!!!

como se dice "i'm gonna get shit faced"????? auf deutsch?